Morrissey - Mann Center, Philadelphia, USA - Monday 23rd July 2007

Approximately 6 hours after stepping off a plane for a work trip to Philadelphia, I was standing in the Mann Center (shouldn't that be "centre"), watching Morrissey play a quite amazing gig. It included more Smiths songs than you can shake a stick at, as well as some others that I'm pretty sure would never be played in front of a British audience. The story is as follows.....

I got to the venue just before 9pm, after landing at the airport that afternoon, and enduring the stupid questions from US immigration. Having been up for a while, and having had a few beers in the couple of hours beforehand, I quite fancied some food inside the venue. I went to a stall, and saw a lovely photo of a cheeseburger on the menu. On ordering, I was told "We have a vegetarian menu tonight sir, er, due to the performer". Ah yes, this was a Morrissey gig!

This was a Morrissey gig, the kind of which you would not see in the UK. On this side of the Atlantic, Morrissey has a small but extremely devoted band of fans. There were plenty of Smiths t-shirts on display, and many of the shirts being sold at the merchandise stand featured photos that were at least 10 years old - still with a full 80s quiff in evidence. That said, there did also still seem to be a good number of people there that had no idea what was going on, or who they were watching. But overwhelmingly, the audience was devoted and loving - even more so than those at the UK gigs I have been to in the past.

To underline the point that this was special, Morrissey came on stage and played The Queen Is Dead immediately, something that I have never heard live before, and that I doubt is very common at UK gigs. During the set, this was joined by Every Day Is Like Sunday, Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want, Girlfriend In A Coma, and a much talked about new song called Throwing My Arms Around Paris, none of which I think you would ever hear in front of the UK media that Morrissey finds so difficult to deal with. Perhaps it is the relative obscurity in the US that is the attraction, but he seemed far more comfortable here than I have ever seen before - getting people up on stage, letting fans talk on the mic, and ripping his shirt off and throwing it into the crowd on a couple of occasions.

Throughout the show, the band seemed much more like an exciting rock band that I expected - their sound was edgy and at times heavy. The highlight for me came during Irish Blood, English Heart, where the lyrics talk about English people, and how Morrissey is embarrassed to be one sometimes. It felt strange standing there as an English person, in the middle of a big crowd of Americans, listening to that.

During the song, instead of lyrics which look forward to the day when "the English are sick to death of Labour", he looked forward to the day when "the Americans are sick to death of Republicans" - which drew an absolutely amazing cheer all round. This is truly a country in which Morrissey seems to feel at home - bantering with the crowd, shaking hands with almost everybody in the front row, identifying the things that they like and dislike, and even engaging in sarcasm with the audience, which a majority seemed even to understand. He may have been born and raised in England, but from what I saw tonight, Morrissey belongs to America and Americans now.

All in all, this was a brilliant set, with the band sounding as exciting as any band I've seen lately, the song selection simply inspired (and it really just made me think about the obscene lengths I would go to, to see any future Smiths reunion), and Morrissey on fantastic form. A real revelation, and I'm so glad I went along.

The Maccabees, Rumble Strips - Camden Lock, London - Thursday 19th July 2007

What better way to spend your birthday, than going to see 2 great bands? This was a special "Best of Festivals" gig organised by MTV, Sony Ericsson and Orange, and open to competition winners only. I entered the competition in several places, all the while grovelling to be allowed in, as it was my birthday. Then, within an hour on Tuesday, I had 2 phone calls, each telling me I had won a pair of magic wristbands to get in. And a new Sony Ericsson phone apparently, which is a nice bonus.

The gig itself took place in a little square piece of land on Camden Lock. Right behind the stage was a canal, and there were even a couple of boats parked up next to the bit where the audience stood. Luckily, despite the worst summer ever, it managed not to rain for the event, which was most welcome. So, we spent the evening standing outside drinking Red Stripe, watching some decent bands playing in front of us.

First on the menu were the Rumble Strips, who ran through a half-hour set of their best material. Including singles Alarm Clock and Motorcycle, their set was as entertaining as ever, with plenty of brass instruments, and somebody playing a big drum at the front of the stage, looking mental. They really are a great band to win over people seeing them for the first time - if you pay attention, you can't really help but end up liking them by the end. Even if you've seen them before, and can't quite remember why you liked it, their live show reminds you pretty quickly.

So, another very good set - but now that they have released a couple of singles, you realise that seeing them live is really the only way to listen to Rumble Strips music. I can't imagine having their album on heavy repeat on my iPod, it just isn't really music that I would sit down and listen to on CD. The difference between how they sound when recorded, and the all round excellence of their live sets, is amazing. Which means people really need to go and see them play, to understand why nice things are being written about them.

The Maccabees followed the Rumble Strips, bounding on stage just after 9pm. Throughout the gig, there were some annoyingly blinding lights at the back of the stage, which made it practically impossible to take any decent photos, and not really very easy to see what the band were doing. It was, however, possible to see that one of the guitarists had his hood up, that Felix the guitarist was bounding around energetically throughout, and that Orlando the singer was doing strange things with his microphone stand. So, a standard Maccabees gig all round, really.

Their set was typically good I thought, playing Latchmere very early on to get people in the mood, putting About Your Dress (which in my view is their utter standout song and moment of genius - how that wasn't a massive hit, I will never know) slap-bang in the middle of the set, and finishing up with First Love and Lego, as per (fairly) normal. Felix and Orlando paused several times to banter with the audience, and obviously sent the majority home happy.

The Maccabees seem to be at a strange point in their rise to prominence at the moment - they are a key part of the London indie scene, along with Good Shoes, Jack Penate, and even Kate Nash. They also seem to have no problem selling out places like the Astoria, and there was a decent and committed crowd there for the gig tonight. But you get the feeling that, with their album already out, this may be the peak of what they do - it is hard to see them selling out a couple of nights at Brixton Academy. Great band in my view, and they should be more popular than they currently are - but it is hard to see how that might happen.

Kasabian, Pop Levi - Somerset House, London - Friday 13th July 2007

Somerset House gigs are usually brilliant, a chance to watch bands play in a stunning courtyard, whilst standing outside on a warm summer evening. The fact that you are outside, but could not be more central in London also helps to make it a weird but great experience. So, an amazing venue, a Friday night, and Kasabian playing, who are becoming more like a modern day version of Oasis as each big gig passes - and by that I mean a very big populist band for lads. Given all this, it had the potential to be a brilliant evening.

This potential was all slightly soured on entering the venue, and encountering the bar queue in the picture here - the bar itself is the white tent literally at the other side of the venue. It took an hour to get from the back of the bar queue to the bar itself, and was a classic example of how to take an amazing venue, then to really dampen people's experience once inside it. So, we all wasted an hour of our lives waiting for a drink, all because the venue couldn't be bothered to fork out for more bar staff, a bigger bar, or quicker beer pumps. It isn't cheap to go to a gig at Somerset House, so being made to wait an hour, when the venue could fix the problem by hiring a few more staff, did make one feel a little bit ripped off. It also doesn't take a genius to work out that "warm evening" + "Friday" + "Kasabian" is likely to mean a strong demand for liquid refreshment. Very, very poor all round on the part of the organisers.

As well as not spending too much money on the bar, the promoters also seemed not to have spent very much on the support band - although they were an American band, they were pretty average I thought. Pop Levi sounded OK enough, and at least we were able to see them whilst queueing for a beer. But despite a couple of catchy songs, their set was generally serving as background music, rather than anything that managed to get the audience too engaged with them.

Now, I mentioned that Kasabian seem to be becoming more like Oasis by the day - and sadly (as well as filling bigger and bigger venues), this also means attracting an "Oasis gig crowd", many of whom would otherwise have been inhabiting pubs that I tend to avoid like the plague. Baseball caps were heavily in evidence, and chavs were all over the place, but the atmosphere was still pretty friendly. I was offered pills on at least 4 occasions, both outside and inside the venue, so maybe that helped to explain the relative calmness.

The audience looked to be split into 3 parts - laddish idiots; people who were desperately copying Oasis or Kasabian fashion and haircuts (the number of pairs of tight jeans, hats, and immaculate indie haircuts I saw was just crazy); and then the relatively normal people, of which of course I was one. Getting Danny Dyer to introduce the band onto the stage really pandered to the idiot section of the crowd, which I really thought was a bad move. Hooray, let's all pretend to be football hooligans whilst at a gig - how big and clever.

Kasabian left it very late to come onto the stage, apparently demanding an extension until 11:30pm, which would allow them to wait until it was properly dark before they started their set. Good on them, because the proper darkness, mixed with the great lighting of the building at Somerset House, made the set seem that much more special. It was almost like being in church (expect with people going mental at the front), which made the whole show seem like a religious experience. Their set was incredible, and it really seemed like a show that they enjoyed playing, not least because of the setting.

Tom the singer initially appeared on stage wearing the pair of Raybans that lots of musicians seem to be sporting at the moment - I'm sure a few hundred pairs were sold to attendees on Saturday. In between songs, I was struck by how much they do seem to be turning into Oasis - right down to the fact that Tom was almost talking to the crowd in a perfect Manc accent - even when he asked "Who's from Leicester?", it didn't sound like he was. Dedicating a song to Noel Gallagher just added to the Oasis love in.

Despite the idiots, and Danny Dyer, and the crazy beer queues, this was a great gig, because Kasabian played an absolutely storming show in a beautiful place. Their set never dipped from being utterly incredible all the way through - the audience knew and loved every song, and the finale of LSF was predictably massive, resulting in choruses echoing down The Strand for a good twenty minutes after the band had left the stage. An hour and a half of consistent brilliance, which makes you believe that they deserve the hype.

A band has to be pretty good to rescue the night after an hour's wait for a drink, and Kasabian were even better than that. I would not be at all surprised if they play Wembley Stadium next summer, such is the rate at which they are becoming the people's band of the moment. Hopefully it won't go to their heads too much.

Kings Of Leon - Hammersmith Apollo, London - Thursday 12th July 2007

The Kings of Leon are possibly one of the most exciting bands anywhere in the world right now. Having released an amazing third album earlier this year, they seem to be infallible. Their albums get better and better, but the band are not (yet) being ruined by too much mainstream success and attention. It sounds strange given the number of records and gig tickets they sell, but still, lots of people don't understand why this band are so good. Thankfully, this leaves them to the rest of us (mostly people that have seen them live) that do understand. That's the way I like it, and a lot more "big" bands would be better if they remained a comparative secret.

This gig was a sneaky London date, squeezed in between lots of festival appearances in Europe. Ahead of Wembley Arena later in the year, this was perhaps one of the last chances to see the Kings Of Leon before they do get generally picked up on, and do become truly massive - their Reading Festival appearance in 6 weeks will certainly do them no harm. They do seem to like Hammersmith Apollo though, they have been playing here for a while, including the hottest gig I think I've ever been to.

The show turned out to be a meeting of a devoted, adoring crowd who seemed to know every word to every song. The band came on stage (ten minutes late, and sporting unusually smart and short haircuts), and dived straight into their set without saying a word. In fact, the band barely spoke to the crowd throughout the set, but in truth they didn't really need to. The band know they are brilliant, the audience all came to see them because they also know they are brilliant, so they just played one killer song after another, instead of filling time by talking crap. Throughout the set, the band were so nonchalant, it all just helped to add to how incredibly cool they were.

The music itself was typically amazing - it was loud, it was laced with heavy guitars, and the sound was that dirty, sweaty rock sound that makes boys want to get drunk, and makes girls want to take their clothes off (or so they say, anyway). A mix of songs from all three albums, the only shame was that they played for only around an hour, plus a short encore. It was like a whirlwind during the set, but it was over too quickly, finishing up with a blisteringly loud version of Slow Night, So Long.

All in all this was a fantastic show, and possibly one of the last chances to see Kings Of Leon on their way to stadia and enormodomes. They deserve their success,as a rare band that writes great songs, is comprised of technically awesome musicians, and are just one of the coolest bands out there. They are taking over the mantle that The Strokes made their own in the early part of this decade - and are possibly the coolest band in the world right now.

Surrey vs Kent - The Oval, London - Friday 6th July 2007

The Twenty20 Cup (to give it its correct name) is rightly a controversial cricket competition. It brings lots of people in to grounds to watch cricket, but they are watching a plastic, invented form of cricket that is sacrilege to those that like the proper game. This game started at 5:30 on a Friday night (perfect timing for those that work in Central London), and was a complete sell-out at The Oval. But, the awful music every time there is a 4, a 6, or a wicket, is surely there only to appeal either to kids, or to the lowest common denominator of cricket watcher - those that don't actually like or know very much about the game at all. And there were lots and lots of the latter in the ground this evening.

This was a must-win game for both teams, with one place in the quarter-finals still up for grabs, basically going to the winner of the game today. Strangely, despite there being 6 teams in the Southern group, and games generally being played home and away, this was the last of only 8 games in the group - not the 10 that might be expected. Never mind. Surrey's innings was something of a let-down (well, for their fans at least, ha ha!). Ramprakash seemed to be the only player in any kind of form, and as the batting got more desperate, and the shots more erratic, Kent could even afford to get away with some dodgy fielding - bowling Surrey out for 145 with a couple of overs to spare.

After the ridiculous "half time", Kent's innings initially got off to an absolute flyer, and it looked like we were going to be out of the ground very quickly. But then Surrey brought the spinners on, and Geraint Jones contrived to start scoring as slowly and laboriously as possible. Kent seemed to be losing their way, and scoring so slowly that they risked dropping out of the game altogether. But luckily, in the last few overs, the boundaries that Kent needed, duly arrived, and they squeezed home with a few balls to spare. Into the quarter finals for the second year in a row (and only the second time ever), and a tough away draw against Nottinghamshire, last year's finalists.

So, Kent did OK, but many of the final overs of the game were not being watched by the majority of the audience. As the pints flowed, many people concentrated on building towers of empty pint glasses, and only looked at the middle of the field when the clip of music played to indicate a boundary or wicket. This really is cricket for people that don't have much of an appetite for paying attention and watching the game - they need to be told when to cheer, when to clap, and when to wave their "6" banner in the air. It is entertaining to an extent, and I hope Kent go all the way and win. But the horrible music reminds me of the Reebok Stadium when Bolton score a goal, a horrendous plastic triumph of marketing over substance.

Ash, Wry - Koko, London - Wednesday 4th July 2007

Ash's millionth studio album was released this week, and they played a 4-night residency at Koko to celebrate. I first got into them in 1995, when they were releasing exciting punky pop singles like Kung Fu and Girl From Mars - and when the band themselves were 17 years old. So, 12 years later, it was not a surprise to see the audience made up of lots of people in their 30s, who probably first got into the band at University, and consequently remember their endless stream of fantastically catchy singles. They really are an amazing singles band, as their singles collection Intergalactic Sonic 7"s showed a few years ago.

The support bands for the 4-nighter were different every night, and were not exactly hired at huge expense, I got the feeling. Tonight's were called Wry, and I had never heard of them before (like a couple of the others in fact). They were OK on the ear, but generally were quite forgettable, and very few people were paying much attention. In fact, the floor was so empty that I wondered whether the gig was the victim of a mass boycott. Not bad, not great, just not anything at all memorable really.

By the time Ash came on, the venue was packed, and they started their set with a couple of songs from the new album. The two previous times I'd seen them this year, they were playing almost wholly Greatest Hits sets, so whilst it was good to hear some of their new stuff, it was a bit frustrating for the majority in the audience that had expected wall-to-wall hits. Slowly but surely, though, they did start to weave ever more older songs into their set, including a brilliantly upbeat version of Walking Barefoot; the obvious Angel Interceptor, and A Life Less Ordinary; and a very pleasant surprise when they played their first ever single, Jack Names The Planets. Kung Fu and Girl From Mars were of course all present and correct too, and by the end of the set, there must have been a good dozen classic hit singles played. That is why so many people love Ash.

On the way out of the venue, it became apparent how hard the band are working to promote their new music. As an old-school fan, I probably wasn't going to buy the new album, but on the way out of the venue I was handed a signed CD inlay for the album. So, £9 means that I have a signed copy, and of course I'll probably head off to play.com to buy one now. Great marketing, but that must have been hard work to sign that many CD inlays. Ash have already said that this will be their last studio album, and that they will now concentrate on making great single tracks instead. Many thought that this is what they have been doing for their whole career, and on tonight's evidence, they can carry on touring their back catalogue, to ecstatic audiences, for ever.

The Hold Steady, The Steers - Shepherds Bush Empire, London - Monday 2nd July 2007

After seeing, and loving, The Hold Steady - in the middle of lots of other bands at Glastonbury - it was great to get a chance to see them again properly, and so soon. This was something of a last-minute decision, with a pair of tickets bought on eBay the day before the gig - for less than the face value for one ticket. It was also a solo gig, as I seem to be the only person I know that is into The Hold Steady. Never mind, it allowed for some quality time spent with the Evening Standard, and my BlackBerry.

Support band for the evening were a band called The Steers, a band I had never heard of before entering the venue, and judging by their MySpace page, neither have many others - only around 1,200 friends, less even than the Belgrave Scandal. How they got the opportunity to support the Hold Steady I don't know, but they were pretty good as it turned out. They had a very brisk but clean indie sound, not dissimilar to The View, but at times they got a bit heavier and shoutier than that. Given this, the fact that the singer was a tall balding bloke, who looked a bit like Ben Folds, meant that it was a bit strange to watch such a sensible-looking band throwing out such a rocky sound. Very enjoyable though, and definitely one to keep an eye on.

The Hold Steady appeared about 15 minutes later than expected (probably because they had been playing elsewhere), and played Stuck Between Stations immediately. As at Glastonbury, the band seemed to be having lots of fun from the word go - which I think always transmits itself to the audience, and instantly makes the gig seem better. As the set progressed, the banter between frontman Craig Finn and the crowd got even better - he is a pretty funny frontman anyway (not quite in the league of We Are Scientists, but then who is?), but he was joking with the crowd and getting good applause back.

One thing about The Hold Steady is that they have some of the best lyrics around at the moment, and current album Boys And Girls In America is the most creative and incisive of the lot. The music is classic rock Americana, reminiscent of Bruce Springsteen, The Replacements, and even Bruce Hornsby, given the keyboard player. But the lyrics and their delivery live are what really make these songs special. The songs are about going out, getting drunk, and having a good time - so when you are at a gig, getting drunk, and looking to have a good time, this band are just what you need. People with tickets for Latitude, Reading or Leeds Festivals are lucky indeed - just get into the album a bit before you see them, and it'll be amazing.

The set here was obviously broader than the set from Glastonbury - the band played virtually every song from Boys And Girls In America, as well as the pick of the songs from their other 2 albums. The huge highlight for me was Party Pit, with its grinding guitars which sounded incredible, and its drunk lyrics. When the final refrain came along - "Gonna walk around, Gonna walk around, Gonna walk around and drink. Gonna walk around and drink some more" - the venue went absolutely crazy, and the band deserved it, they were that good. As well as this, new single Chips Ahoy, as well as the rarely-played Chillout Tent, were big highlights of an excellent set.

This was The Hold Steady's biggest headline gig ever (or so they said), even including those they have played in the US. I am glad that the UK seems to be liking them, although they are still not getting much music press coverage, and this gig was not hyped, and not beseiged by touts and dodgy merchandise sellers. The band don't necessarily have a huge "buzz" around them, but they definitely seem to be gradually building a fanbase here - which is utterly deserved, as their lyrics and live performances show. Hopefully they will be back to see us again soon, after all the festivals are over.

Sightseeing in Prague, Czech Republic - Thursday 28th June 2007

My sightseeing started one evening, after finishing work - after a bite to eat, I ventured off into the city just before dark. I wanted to have a quick wander around some of the main central areas, before a proper assault the following day - and just to get reacquainted with Prague. So, I made a quick tour of the Charles Bridge, a view of the castle as it got dark, followed by the Old Town Square and Wenceslas Square.

My first impressions were that the centre of the city had changed little, except that many traces of Czech-ness had been replaced by generic tourist stuff. The tourist trap restaurants, souvenir shops and money changing outlets were all still there, plus more, and they seemed to have got even more sophisticated (if that is possible). It is an efficient machine to fleece tourists, but surely there cannot be many regular tourists in Europe that have not now visited Prague - everybody I know seems to have been there! However, just before sunset, the centre of the city was quite quiet, although that was probably because the bars, restaurants and theatres were all very full!

Wenceslas Square seemed to have got even more seedier than I remember it, which again I didn't think would be possible! It is a safe assumption that any bar or nightclub there, especially if playing music, has naked women as the centre of the entertainment - and there are armies of big Nigerian guys trying to "persuade" people to go in and sample the entertainment, But, even at 10pm on a Wednesday night, I saw at least 3 groups of British lads wandering around, so I'd guess there is plenty of custom to go around. And I guess there lies the problem - Wenceslas Square has got tackier and sleazier, but it is largely the fault of my fellow countrymen, who go there with full wallets, looking for sleazy activities.

The following morning, I headed out into the city again, starting with a number 22 tram up the bloody great hill to the castle. I arrived there (after a nice lie in) just before midday, and the place was absolutely rammed with tour parties - this before the main tourist months of July and August even. I started taking pictures of the amazing view from the castle, over the city, when I was startled to hear some trumpets playing, and playing something that sounded like the music from The Great Escape. I wandered over to the castle gates, and saw what appeared to be a changing of the guards ceremony taking place.

Now, having spent months on end in Prague whilst on university summer holidays, I have seen the guards change at Prague castle dozens of times. Previously, some new guards would wander over to the guard huts, talk the the old guards for a minute or two, who would then wander off (probably to the pub). It lasted for a minute, and was really nothing special to see. This has now been replaced by a full "changing of the guard" ceremony, complete with brass instruments, marching, shouting, saluting, and banging bayonets onto the ground. All utterly fake and pointless, and presumably invented because if you have guards at a castle, tourists expect to be able to see them changed!

Shocked by this experience, I decided against walking down through the castle, surrounded by hundreds of guard change watchers. So, I walked down lots of stairs instead, that run down the side of the castle, between its main entrance, and the Mala Strana part of town. These stairs have been used in lots of films, adverts, and a video by an ex-Spice Girl (now a Spice Girl again, temporarily), although I can't remember if it was Geri or Posh Spice. Anyway, loads of stairs, lots of walking, and almost some falling over too. Near the bottom of the stairs is the British Embassy, with a lovely statue of Winston Churchill outside.

Having descended from the heights of the castle, the next big Prague attraction was to walk across the Charles Bridge, which was built hundreds of years ago, and has lots of statues along it on both sides. Americans always fail to understand how old it is, because "700 years old" just does not compute (I think it is actually older than that). There were lots of tourists here too - I thought they were ALL at the castle - and lots of people who make a living by selling things to tourists for MUCH more than their true cost. If you want a shitty caricature, get it here. Or your name written really small on a piece of rice (can't you get that in any city in the world?). Or a small painting of the bridge on which you are standing. I just settled for taking a photo, whilst listening to one of the many weird buskers - this one was playing the Red Hot Chili Peppers' Under The Bridge, using a didgeridoo and a bongo. Utter tourist hell, in one short walk of tackiness.

Winding through the narrow streets to the Old Town Square, past endless shops selling "bargain" cut glass, I noticed that several traditional old places had been replaced by more bland, generic bars and restaurants, sometimes advertising "traditional Czech food and beer", alongside the general chicken and chips. In many places, it almost seemed as if the long-standing tradition of Czech beer drinking was being relegated to a mere curiosity - I saw Miller Genuine Draft being advertised, and "traditional Czech beer" in small letters at the bottom of the advert, as if nobody would want to sample that. Also, the "traditional" Czech food being advertised, sometimes seemed somewhat less than authentic. Goulash with dumplings sounded more like a traditional Hungarian dish, with some Czech dumplings thrown in. But tourists want their safe, international stuff, so on such a busy tourist route, maybe it was unreasonable to expect anything more.

Reaching the Old Town Square restored my faith in the beauty of the city. After the tourist traps which have ruined some parts of the city for me, it was great to get to the stunning square and see that little had changed here. Classical concerts were one of the few things advertised here, as much of the square is protected from too much tacky, intrusive advertising.

I think in summary for me, Prague has changed a lot in the ten years or so since I was spending significant time here. Of course that is to be expected, but I thought that too much had been sanitised for tourists - too much generic, international crap, at the expense of wiping away some of the traditional Czech-ness which used to give the city so much charm. Much of the city centre of Prague could just be a Disney-like theme park of a beautiful old city - and many traces of where it is, or the specific history, culture or food, have been hidden away - that is a real shame. But then many Czechs are abandoning their culture and history too, in favour of driving Western cars, eating at McDonalds, drinking expensive imported beer, and hanging out at new shopping malls. It is almost like the locals have moved out of the city centre, to their new out-of-town hypermarkets, and abandoned it to the tourists. Hopefully, like in other cities, that trend will reverse itself, and the locals will claim back their beautiful city.

Ozzy Osbourne, Korn - Sazka Arena, Prague, Czech Republic - Tuesday 26th June 2007

Wow, have I been to some strange gigs lately! Courtesy of my colleagues in the Czech Republic, I went to a large ice hockey arena in Prague, to see Ozzy Osbourne play, also "ably" supported by Korn. Of course, when you think of Eastern Europe, one of the things that springs to mind is an unhealthy liking for heavy metal, with all the dodgy hair and fashion sense that this entails. This gig utterly lived up to the stereotype - the Russians have an awful lot to answer for.

Korn were the support band, and did all the cheesy heavy metal excess in spades, enough to wind the crowd up for Ozzy. The lead singer appeared to be wearing a kilt, and there were several band members on stage whose exact purpose was unclear. One member in particular seemed to be there solely to provide a few growling backing vocals, and to swing his long hair around in a circle, like some kind of signal to all the metallers in the audience.

During Korn's set, I started to feel slightly self-conscious wearing my nice red Strokes t-shirt - it was nowhere near black enough, and I was looking very out of place amongst all the heavy metal hand salutes (you know the really cliched "666" ones). In general, Korn made an awful noise (I sound really old by saying that, but it is true), to an audience of people that seemed to be lapping it all up. Why they need 2 drummers at all times, rising to 3 for certain songs, is a complete mystery.

When the singer growled "get your muthafuckin hands in the air", everybody went mad - I suspect partly because the word "fuck" had just been used. The only (small) saving grace was that they played a bit of the Metallica song One, which was the only tuneful moment of their set. I can safely say that Korn were the most awful band I have ever seen play live, especially in front of an audience of over 10,000 people. 10,000 people meant that one in every thousand citizens of the Czech Republic was watching that show - truly shocking.

If Korn were just plain bad (trust me, they were), then Ozzy Osbourne himself was like a pantomime, his show was so laughable. For many of the songs, he was so incredibly out of tune, and sounded either drunk or very drugged throughout. Which of course, is how Ozzy Osbourne sounds! His drunk Brummie accent had strangely disappeared completely, and been replaced by a really strong American accent - most unusual. And I got the impression throughout that none of the audience understood a word of what he was singing or saying - after all, it was difficult enough for me to understand him, and in theory we speak the same language.

In reality, much of what was going on seemed quite sad. Ozzy was doddering around on stage like an old man, rather than any swaggering or prancing. The instances of staged rock and roll excess, like throwing a bucket of water over the crowd, or saying "come on you fuckers", just seemed to be so ridiculous as to be simultaneously funny and sad. But maybe these over-the-top cliches are all the rage either at heavy metal gigs, or in Eastern Europe, or both. In between most songs, Ozzy would say "Are you having a good time tonight?" in his American accent. The crowd would cheer, then Ozzy would say "I can't fucking hear you". The crowd would cheer a bit louder, then he would say "I love you all". When this was repeated for the tenth time, it all seemed highly contrived.

In between all this nonsense, some of the songs actually sounded OK, although obviously a bit heavy for my normal liking. Or maybe it was just because we had just been treated to Korn. There were a decent number of Black Sabbath songs, which went down really well, some from Ozzy's solo career, and about the same number from his new album, which nobody seemed to have heard, let alone to care much about. My colleagues were enjoying the show as little as I was, so we slipped out after a good hour and a half, but while Ozzy was still going strong on stage. A very strange experience all in all, one that I am unlikely to forget in a hurry, but have absolutely no desire to ever repeat. A heavy metal gig in London is bad enough, but transplanted to Eastern Europe, it is a positively surreal experience.

Work trip to Prague, Czech Republic - 25th to 28th June 2006

The day after arriving home from Glastonbury, it was straight back off to another place that could be considered to be hell on earth. There is no mud, but Heathrow Airport can be a pretty awful place to spend time sometimes. This was one of those times - there is a particular set of gates in Terminal One which have "extra security", because the airport authorities are too incompetent to stop outgoing and incoming passengers from mixing together. Security only starts when the gate is called, and there is only one metal detector for everybody to walk through. This time, it took an hour to get through this extra security, and the scrum to reach the front of the "queue" looked something like this. If I were an airline boss, I would be livid at the fact that BAA treated hundreds of my customers like that - it really is a disgrace, and for London's main airport to be such a shambles is a really bad reflection on the whole city and country.

Anyway, off to Prague, where I used to go very regularly, but hadn't been to for about the last five years. I was there to talk to some clients, and some colleagues too. A beautiful city, and some time off into the bargain for sightseeing.

One big thing I noticed whilst in the city, was the extent to which Czech people have started abandoning many of the things they used to do. For example, many people now drink wine, spirits, and imported beer - this in the country that makes the best beer in the world, and where you couldn't even buy imported brands 10 years ago. I saw lots of people in bars drinking cocktails, Chilean wine, and Stella Artois - a big change from a few years ago, and what was a nation of massive beer drinkers.

Similarly, there are Chinese, Greek and pizza restaurants everywhere, and Czechs eager to eat in them - you can get most foods in Prague now, except for all that much Czech stuff. Obviously, people are enjoying more disposable income than they have ever had, but it seems a shame that the place is becoming less "Czech", as people indulge a desire to do more "international" things.

One other big difference that I noticed since my last trip, was the number of English speakers, and the standard of English that they spoke - the nation has been at school learning English for much of the last five years! As well as making everything very easy for an English speaker, it is surely helping the country secure international business, and helping the people here advance themselves and improve their standard of living.